This site was created to act as a counter balance to the hysterical reactions that wives and husbands get when they consult the internet about their spouses being over fat. Typically when a person uses the internet as a resource for dealing with the situation, we find a disproportionate number of
1. Violent hostile reactions to anyone who suggests that their wife or husband should lose weight.
2. Rampant excuse making. Apparently there are no fat people, who have become overweight by their own!
Below, I have a link to a typical forum, with the typical bashing of a husband who has a legitimate concern about his wife's weight. These flame sessions are meant more to intimidate than to actually convey information.
The effort is an attempt to brow beat any spouse who questions their mate's size into silence. This effectively censors any criticism of weight from any public forum. Often, we see a penis size analogy used to try to equate the two "physical" inadequacies. This analogy falls short, "so to speak", since first, a husband’s penis was the same size when he became married and second his penis size is not a choice, being fat is!
Additionally excuse making also prevails through out the internet. A typical example of a media attempt at excuse making is shown in the link below. The author of the book, featured in this editorial believes that the way to make your fat wife thinner is to compliment her more, about her looks.
Am I the only one who realizes if you tell a fat wife or fat hubby that they are "hot" when they are not, you will only encourage the behavior? Someone needs to find an example of this approach actually working. I suspect if one follows this technique you will have an electric cart riding monstrosity in no time. In the video interview attached to that same article, I noticed that this Rabbi was a close personal friend of Michael Jackson. Silly Rabbi...
Re: Chris, that crazy musclehead, had a good explanation for creating My Fat Spouse
Thank you for the article! I have a similar problem with my- overweight spouse. When we first dated she was not thin but she really worked on her diet and exercised right along side me. She knew I was very concerned about her weight while we dated. She swore up and down that she would loose the weight. To fast forward this story, after the wedding she just went back to her old ways of eating, and drinking ( she concealed her alcoholism all the way thru our dating and our first year of marriage ). I have bought gym memberships. I have lost weight just changing my own diet to show her it can be done. I have bought workout equipment, begged her, pleaded to her from a medical standpoint-I am nursing student. I have pleaded with her about how are sex life is dead and has been for years. I am tired of the excuses she has to not loose weight and Lord she has them- depression, her job, stress-who the hell does not have stress? Oh she has time on her hands tons of it all devoted to TV and movies, but exercise- no way in hell. I am trying to not to breakdown into tears, but she now is twice my weight. I could write a book about the dangers of being overweight but everyone here already knows what they are. A little tidbit about her medical history-she had a gastric bypass before we dated and it did help her loose 100 lbs. Yet she now weights in at 290 lbs standing 5' 3", me- 145 lbs. standing at 5' 5". Sex is so uncomfortable and miserable that I run away from it, and suffer in silence. When we eat out, I order the salad and lean meats, she orders the The El Capitano plate seething in every fat and carb Tex Mex can offer. I am angry, and frustrated. I feel I am watching her slowly commit suicide by food and alcohol. She does not listen to me or care to hear my frustrations and disappointment. I have been living like this for 8 years and one separation over these very issues. Her friends and family are useless in expressing concern over this dangerous path. I am not looking for advice here, as my next step is clear as day. I have just have one piece of advice- you can live in pain and silence or confront the issue and free yourself to the live the one and only life you will ever have.